Stressing out...

I really feel overloaded and overwhelemed by the amount of things i still  have to do: moving out, preparing the 8 months trip and perparing the one and only marriage i'm gonna have
Moving out is happening next wednesday so we just need to pack and wait
The trip is almost ready: the tickets,  the visas and the vaccinations, still remains filling up the bags
The marriage is not ready at all: we picked the place and the date, but still no dress and no invitations….

Today...

My brains is still sleeping

My body constantly freezing

From the window i watch the snow falling

And it creates inside me a shivering

My to do list is not shrinking

My motivation to work on it is almost unexisting

My favorite activity is procrastinating

And all this feels unexciting

What to do when the weather is sucky

How to work when the job is yucky

Two more days to finally be free

But my gathering is really not nearly ready

Shall i sleep in the office tonight?

Or just fight until i flight

I really can't grab another bite

For even my stomach doesn't feel right

Thank God for the dream of a better future

It's so close I can hear the crow of the rooster

I am ready for change it's not really peculiar

I am so excited, it really feels super

Goodwill hunting

Every once in a while i am just shocked at people's behaviors…

Actually it happens once every couple of years

Some people tell me that it is just my crazy brain going neurotic or that I am stressed and need holidays

But what I really thing is that those people just don’t have the ability to control their mood and thus their reactions

I believe that our society is suffering from a virus: the toxic people's virus

But luckily we are not all infected

Actually, there are some ways and methods to prevent that and to guard our good heart intact and thus be happy during our stay on this earth

I believe in therapy and in reading good thoughts, but there are many ways to get that same effect

While growing up, I had a pretty tough adolescence, I didn’t have the right tools to face the many issues that I was encountering and the social development during that period was violent. I felt that it was hard to flourish from adolescence to adulthood, with a good self image and a healthy self esteem.

Now looking back at that period I just smile and say that it could have been easier for me but still I did it my way and I am still on the path .... 

I guess we all carry injuries from the past and the key is not to bury them but to heal them whenever we feel ready to do it

So this is christmas

Make a wish and close your eyes tight,
Sprinkle this on your lawn Christmas Eve night,
As Santa and his reindeer roam,
This sparkly dust will lead them to your home,
The reindeer will love their oatmeal snack,
While they are waiting for Santa to come back.

639 days ago.......

Vote Vote Vote and then relax :)

 

http://www.kickstarter.com/projects/2012872548/dont-panic-ipad-case-stand-and-sneaker?ref=live

Learn to get comfortable while being uncomfortable - by Christine Kane

There are scary moments in the journey of business and life.
But there’s nothing quite as intense as the moment of clarity when you suddenly see what’s REALLY possible for you.  You see how SMALL you’ve been thinking.  You realize that you can play a wildly bigger game.
The question arises: Can I be this big? Can I let myself do this?
In other words…
I think I’m ready to release these old limitations.  I think it’s time to quit worrying about the opinions of others.  I really can stop hiding.  Am I up for it?!
Many people ignore these questions and go back to their old comfort zone. Don’t be one of them!
As my students are still reveling in the inspiring energy from last week’s Uplevel LIVE! Retreat – I invite you to use our mojo to re-ignite, re-inspire, and re-invigorate your visions and dreams before the new year begins!

Here are five steps to help you stop playing small and start living BIG in 2012.

1 – Mind your Mind
Your thoughts are things. They can be powerful tools, or devastating weapons.
It’s not always quick to clean up years of negativity.  AND the truth is you are the only one who can begin to do just that.  If you constantly berate yourself, doubt yourself, or obsess about the opinions of others, set your intention to turn that around.
Listen to upbeat audiobooks in your car.  Post affirmations in visible spots.  Start a gratitude journal.
Remind yourself: “Energy flows where attention goes,” and place your attention on gratitude, love, and joy.

2 – Take Action
Back when I first got the idea to offer events and retreats, I kept waiting for self-esteem to appear before I would take the chance and just do it.
Guess what? That’s not how it works!
Instead, my coach and mastermind made me commit to a date on paper – and then offer my first event to the world.  (I’ve since done this many times!)
What I discovered was this:
Self-esteem shows up BECAUSE you take action.  Not before!
What one action-step can you take toward your dream today?

3 – Radiate Success
Do you complain to anyone who will listen?  Do you tell your sad story to get people to feel sorry for you?
Living big means you radiate success.
Stop tweeting about how miserable you are.  Don’t moan about your current challenges with your clients.  Refrain from whining to your friends about how hard it is to run your own business!  (Save that stuff for your coach if you need to get it out of your system.)
Remember this: Like attracts like.  When you radiate success, then success is drawn to you.

4 – Exit your Comfort Zone
“If you do what you’ve always done, you’ll get what you’ve always got!”
This is one of my favorite expressions.  Cuz it’s true!
I’ve worked with hundreds of people as a mentor, coach, and leader of retreats. The ones who create breakthroughs are always the ones who are willing to exit their comfort zones.  They let themselves get scared. They say yes to new opportunities. They take time to ask themselves what they want next and how they can create it.
People who live big have one thing in common:
They learn to get comfortable being uncomfortable!

5 – Surround Yourself with Support
I hired my first coach ten years ago.  I paid him more per month than my mortgage at the time!  I’ve since been a part of many coaching groups and masterminds – continuing to invest in this model of support and training.  I swear by it!
Many people don’t do this. Instead, they take a “duct tape” approach to their own support and training, hoping they can continue to get away with their same old fearful behavior, always promising themselves that “some day” they’ll get some real support.
It never works. They stay at the same level. (After all, that’s where it’s comfortable!)
Surround yourself with encouraging believers who are, like you, fully invested in their success, and who want you to succeed.
Many people live and socialize in toxic environments.   If this is you, then step out of your comfort zone and actively seek out positive people who want to create and attract their dreams.  Surround yourself with people who want to live big like you!

Sick of being a doormat

Sometimes in life, for not apparent reason, people just walk all over you.

“For though a righteous man falls seven times, he rises again...”
(Proverbs 24:16, NIV)

Life is full of things that try to push us down. We all face disappointments and setbacks. Maybe you received some bad news about your health or perhaps a relationship didn’t work out. That was a setback. It’s easy to get discouraged or lose your enthusiasm or even be tempted to just settle where you are. But if we’re going to see God’s best, we have to have a “bounce back” mentality. That means when you get knocked down, you don’t stay down. You get back up again. You have to know that every time adversity comes against you, it’s a setup for a comeback!

There is no challenge too difficult, no obstacle too high, no sickness, no disappointment, no person, nothing that can keep you from your God-given destiny. If you stay in faith, then God will turn what was meant to be a stumbling block into a stepping stone, and you’ll move forward in strength, full of faith and victory!

A PRAYER FOR TODAY

Father in heaven, thank You for setting me up for success in everything I do. I choose to trust and rely on You knowing that Your plans are for my good. I know my best days are ahead of me and look ahead to the blessings You have in store for me.

— Joel & Victoria Osteen

So many things to do......commit to doing them!!!!

                                              http://cherieiam.blogspot.com/2011/05/little-overwhelmed.html
 
Time is flying and tasks are accumulating ....what to do to solve that dilemma????
Hmm… make to-do lists, or better: will-do lists

http://litemind.com/will-do-lists/

and try not to procrastinate (which i have a natural tendency to do)

There are two important principles to keep in mind about this new list:

1. It’s a list of commitments

Your goal should be to complete 100% of your daily will-do list, every day. Remember that these tasks are commitments: if you’re not serious about crossing off each and every item from your will-do list, there’s no point in creating one. Therefore, you need to be extremely careful in putting just a few items there: when in doubt, be conservative.

(I usually don’t book more than 2 hours’ worth of daily will-do tasks, or I am unable to sustain the 100% completion rate for too long. I also usually tackle my daily will-do list as soon as I can, using highly-focused time boxes.)

2. Once set, don’t add any more items to it

The will-do list is intended to be a closed list: once created, don’t add anything to it during the day.

That means that the only possible thing that can happen to your list is that it will get smaller. And that is the big trick: your list is not a moving target, but a finite and measurable workload that you can actually finish. That is much better for your motivation than the sight of endless to-do lists. Can you still remember the feeling of crossing off the very last item of your task list?

Of course, you should still add items to your master task list as usual. But unless the new items are extremely urgent (and they usually aren’t), you must avoid as much as possible adding them to today’s will-do list.

Be like the fruits

Be Like the fruits, beautiful on the outside and healthy on the inside...Have inner beauty

Why?

Because we dont see things as they are, we see things as we are

How?


Art therapy...... it is a process that uses the creative act of art making to improve and enhance the physical, mental and emotional well-being of individuals of all ages.

It is based on the belief that the creative process involved in artistic self-expression helps people to resolve conflicts and problems, develop interpersonal skills, manage behavior, reduce stress, increase self-esteem and self-awareness, and achieve insight....oh yeah!!!!

Revelation

Lately i have been all about understanding life more gently, and i am beginning to think of problems as opportunities to become a better and more knowledgeable person …

I believe there is an inner space within each and every one of us that guides us and that tells us what we need to do …of course we can choose to listen to it or not , but i do..

This inner voice is just the proof that we are a combination of physical and spiritual being and it shows us that we dont have to use black or white but that there is a wide range of colors in between...

this might lead me to making mistakes but its ok , i would rather do what is right and proper than what makes me feel good at the moment
 

1 Corinthians 13

 ¹ If I speak in the tongues^[a] of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. ² If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. ³ If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast,^[b] but do not have love, I gain nothing. 

 ⁴ Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. ⁵ It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. ⁶ Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. ⁷ It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. 

 ⁸ Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. ⁹ For we know in part and we prophesy in part, ¹⁰ but when completeness comes, what is in part disappears. ¹¹ When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me. ¹² For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known. 

 ¹³ And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.

Damage control

I always took it for granted to have a no-guilt no-should cancellation policy.

What that means is that whenever i make plans, if anything at all comes up (even just feeling like staying home and reading) i allow full cancellation with no guilt required. this relaxes me and makes  me see relationships differently than contractual work, and i beleive that it gives permission and even tests the depth of the love...


I think that love sometimes means letting the other person be disappointed. But NEVER means doing anything out of “should” or guilt, i mean this is how i used to act with my mom...and i'm sure many people disagree


Apparently many people get upset with me for this, but since i accept it for the people i love they should be able to accept it for me…

That type of day.....

love your neighbor as yourself

L'amelie poulain suisse et masculin

Le projet semble un peu fou : distribuer gracieusement en tous-ménages, du 7 au 11 novembre, un livre sobrement intitulé « Être bien ». Au total, 100.000 exemplaires seront destinés à la Suisse romande, mais pas moins de 75 000 pour la seule région de la Côte. Un livre blanc, à savourer quand tout va bien ou à consulter plus attentivement quand la vie vous malmène. « C’est comme un livre de recettes faciles à suivre qui, je l’espère, aideront le plus grand nombre de personnes à mieux vivre, à s’aimer soi-même, à aimer les autres, à aimer la vie », explique son auteur, Joseph Stutz. « C’est le fruit de toute une vie d’expériences, de réflexions et de découvertes personnelles, que j’ai cru bon de partager. »

Dans la grande villa nichée sur une colline de la campagne vaudoise, on pourrait croire que le philanthrope est un privilégié, isolé dans sa tour d’ivoire. Et pourtant, né en Suisse alémanique d’un père jardinier et d’une mère femme de ménage, Joseph Stutz a traversé des épreuves parfois professionnelles, mais aussi familiales, la plus dure étant le décès de sa femme en 2008, après huit années de descente aux enfers, dues à la maladie d’Alzheimer. « J’étais dévasté, mais j’ai fait le choix d’accepter l’épreuve, de ne pas m’effondrer et de continuer à aller de l’avant. » En décembre 2006, Joseph fait la connaissance d’Anna Wälti-Berti, maman d’une fille autiste et créatrice de la Fondation Le Cube de Verre qui vient en aide aux enfants atteints d’autisme et à leurs familles. Sensible à cette cause, il lui apporte son soutien financier pour construire à Arzier un foyer pouvant accueillir une vingtaine d’enfants autistes. « Mon but est aussi de faire d’une pierre deux coups, confie Joseph Stutz, et je glisserai dans le livre un bulletin de versement en faveur de cette Fondation. Peut-être que des lecteurs auront, eux aussi, envie d’aider cette institution qui ne reçoit aucun fonds de l’Etat et qui a besoin de la générosité privée pour exploiter son foyer. » La compassion, la volonté d’aider son prochain, l’ouverture aux autres comptent sans doute parmi les clés du bonheur et de la joie de vivre dont nous parle Joseph Stutz dans son livre. Dans les premières pages, on y lit cette dédicace : « Cet ouvrage est dédié à tous ceux qui souffrent ».

How to be jolly and bubbly in this holiday season

It's Christmas and everyone is happy, the streets are well dressed with their best accessories and i just feel like a kid amazed at all this beauty

It's just the best time of the year, where it can be winter but you just don’t mind, I might even say I am glad for the cold and the snow, it smells like spices and potpourri everywhere

But Christmas or no Christmas some people can be really disappointing or some life events, how not to let that get to you?

I guess it's hard but doable….

Standing for what we believe in is important, positioning ourselves strengthens us and pray pray pray

Self-love, however, is what you're searching for at work, in your relationships and your life. Sadly, people spend most of their time thinking someone or something else can give them what only they can give themselves. To be truly fulfilled in life and relationships, you have to find the love within you and give it to yourself. No other person, material possession or accomplishment can do it. It's up to you.
Especially when it comes to relationships, self-love is essential. One of the best gifts you can give to the people around you is to love yourself in a genuine way. As my mom used to say to me when I was young, "You can't love anyone else until you love yourself." By Mike Robbins

Found in my mom's belongings

Holding grudge for someone shows emotional imbalance

A grudge is defined as "resentment strong enough to justify retaliation". Everyone has, at some time or other, been hurt deeply by someone close. Bitterness about the person or situation leads to a grudge.

Personal injustice ignites resentment in heart, which turns into a grudge. Since grudge is a form of resentment, a person who bears grudge may become revengeful. Instead of focusing on what he needs to solve a problem, for instance, he may spend most of his time thinking of ways to get back at whom he resents. This can be dangerous for there is a possibility of injuries.

When someone hurts us, a natural human reaction is to hurt them back. Our very nature spurs us to settle the score, to get even. Usually we forgive the offender over the time as the intensity weakens over period. If we do not forgive the offender the only alternatives are to try revenge, or decide to hold a grudge. The person who hurt us might not even know how angry and bitter we feel. Our emotions of hate and anger continue to aggravate at their supposed indifference. Isn't it ridiculous that in supposedly getting even with another, the only ones we hurt are ourselves at all health levels, physically, spiritually and emotionally.

A grudge pours its corrosive bitterness into us, arrogating our entire being. Soon the door will be open for envy, malice, jealousy, bitterness, gossip, and slander to come and visit. We will stop at nothing to even the score against the other party. Holding a grudge will only devour you from inside out, eventually turning you into a bitter person. All this happens because you refuse to forgive the one who hurt you. The price to pay is too high.

If we have a grudge, we feel guilty. We will sub-consciously feel unaccepted and we will never feel fully forgiven. Holding a grudge keeps life running on rewind, preventing us from moving on with life and looking forward to the future. We keep looking over our shoulders at some past injustice we experienced. We recall how awful it was. A grudge handcuffs us to this negative past, causing us to irrationally dwell on the past and blame our present failures on past misfortunes.

Releasing this grudge can bring happiness and release. Carrying a grudge pokes holes in our energy bucket. We will feel constantly tired, weary, and lethargic. Fatigue is the faithful companion of a grudge. At the end of each day you will collapse in exhaustion, wondering why we feel so fatigued. It is because we are wasting great amounts of unconscious energy maintaining our grudge. Releasing this grudge through forgiveness will result in a brand new surge of emotional and physical energy. It is difficult, if not impossible, to forgive an offense. Our memory has been created in such a way that it will contain all the events of your lives. It is conceivable that you can remember everything that ever occurred in your life, especially painful experiences, or more so the feelings resulting from these experiences.

Therefore, when we cannot forget an offense, we can choose not to dwell on it. We cannot fully erase the memory banks of our mind but we do have the power to refuse to think on past injustices, once forgiven.

The best way to deal with a grudge is to stop thinking about the grudge itself and focus on accomplishing important goals. We will gain satisfaction and self-worth from accomplishing these goals. Conversely, the worst possible way to deal with a grudge would be to dwell on it. If we push ahead and create a satisfying life, we will feel less frustrated and less angry. It will take our mind off your grudge. We will be more willing to take responsibility for our actions, and our need to blame will dissipate. We will not want to taint our happiness by being ungracious. In essence, getting ahead in our lives will come to be more important than getting even. Hate begets hate. Happiness begets happiness.

The best way to forget is to improve our behavior and circumstances until we feel safe enough to let go of bitter memories. If someone has upset us in the past, try to work out an informal agreement with the person so you can feel reasonably sure it will not happen again.

Often the reasons of "holding a grudge for someone" are more mental than physical. A bad relationship, poor self image, a history of abuse, stress, frustration and many other factors can change your overall attitude towards life which may directly impede your overall performance. Such tendencies are deep-rooted in mind and nurtured by excessive Negative Emotions.

It is needless to mention that these negative emotions are tremendously powerful. They can debilitate lives extremely quick by causing disparity in energy system, which triggers a sequence of emotional imbalance (i.e. frustration, melancholia, persistent agony, mental instability, uncontrolled anger, inferiority complex etc.), which ultimately culminates in ill health.

From my mom

Choose to feel the magic

                                                                  Illustration by Serge Bloch

We can choose to enjoy the magic of this time of year. We may not always get to choose the people and circumstances around us, but we always have a choice about how we relate to them.
— Mike Robbins

La flamme intérieure... cette présence ultra-sensible et indestructible...Denis Jaccard

La première fois où une personne m'a parlé d'une présence ultra-sensible et indestructible au coeur de chaque être humain, j'ai d'abord souri avant de me questionner. Qu'est-ce que cela peut bien vouloir dire ? Comment est-il possible qu'une présence vivante au coeur de chaque être humain puisse être simultanément ultra-sensible et indestructible ?

C'était il y a quelques années et je dois vous avouer qu'il m'a fallu du temps pour appréhender le sens profond de cette image. A cette époque, j'étais encore habité par mes certitudes cartésiennes et mes habitudes logiques. Lorsque l'on a été informaticien comme je l'ai été, il y a des schémas de pensées qui restent ancrés bien longtemps. Une ampoule ne peut pas être allumée et éteinte en même temps tout comme un être humain ne peut avoir peur et confiance en même temps.

Depuis, fort heureusement, les choses ont changé et j'ai pu apprendre à envisager les choses avec davantage de souplesse, d'ouverture et de créativité. Aujourd'hui, j'ai cette conviction qu'il est possible de se sentir triste et heureux en même temps tout comme il y a, en notre coeur, une présence à la fois ultra-sensible et indestructible.

La flamme d'une bougie peut apporter cette présence qui réchauffe et éclaire comme elle peut produire cette force qui blesse et qui détruit. Il suffit d'un léger souffle pour éteindre la flamme de l'allumette alors que l'incendie de forêt allumé par cette même flamme paraîtra indestructible.

Les similitudes entre la flamme de la bougie ou de l'allumette et la flamme intérieure sont nombreuses. Comme la flamme de la bougie ou de l'allumette, la flamme intérieure a besoin d'oxygène pour exister. Comme la flamme de la bougie ou de l'allumette, la flamme intérieure est constamment en mouvement dans une chorégraphie à la fois imprévisible et souple. Dans sa définition même, la flamme est le symbole de lumière, de vie, de passion et d'amour.

Lorsque j'étais petit garçon, je me souviens que j'avais la chance de pouvoir me rendre dans un atelier d'artisanat où j'avais le droit de fabriquer des bougies. Je garde un souvenir très puissant des pots remplis de cire de toutes les couleurs dans lesquels je plongeais la mèche de ma bougie. Au fur et à mesure des passages de la mèche dans la cire, la bougie devenait de plus en plus épaisse et resplendissante de milles couleurs. Sur le chemin du retour, c'est avec une fierté rayonnante que je portais mes bougies. Je les rangeais précieusement afin qu'elles puissent sécher dans les meilleures conditions. Lorsque Noël approchait, je sortais mes bougies et les installais sur les plus beaux bougeoirs de la maison. Cependant, il était hors de question de les allumer. Je ne supportais pas l'idée qu'elles puissent se consumer et disparaître. Même si mes parents me répétaient sans cesse que c'était dommage de ne pas pouvoir profiter de leur belle lumière et de leur chaleur, je ne pouvais me résoudre à cette éventualité.

Il y a quelques mois, l'occasion m'a été offerte de participer à un atelier de création de bougies. A nouveau, cette sensation formidable d'émerveillement m'a habité lorsque je plongeais la mèche dans la cire. Les souvenirs de mon enfance se mélangeaient à mon expérience d'adulte. Maintenant, mes bougies sont bien rangées dans l'armoire en train de sécher. Tout semble pareil et, pourtant, il y a une très grande différence. Cette fois, j'ai pris l'engagement, à l'occasion des fêtes de fin d'année, de les allumer et de leur offrir le plaisir de briller dans les yeux de mes enfants. Ces bougies ont été conçues pour briller et réchauffer et rien ne pourra les empêcher de vivre pleinement leur destinée.

La flamme intérieure qui nous habite est intimement reliée à la vie qui bat en nous. Je ne sais pas si notre destinée est écrite quelque part où si nous sommes appelés à la créer de toutes pièces. Ce dont je suis certain, en revanche, c'est que cette flamme est précieuse et unique. En acceptant d'oser faire face à la réalité terrible que cette flamme ne durera pas toujours, alors nous pourrons encore mieux apprécier sa valeur. En nous reliant à sa dimension ultra-sensible, nous avons l'opportunité d'apprivoiser et d'accepter notre sensibilité et notre vulnérabilité. Cette facette de nous-même avec laquelle nous pouvons être si souvent en conflit et qui nous empêche d'être pleinement authentique. Comme le disait si justement Carl Rogers (l'un des pères de la psychologie humaniste), c'est lorsque je réussis enfin à m'accepter tel que je suis que je commence à pouvoir changer.

Aller à la rencontre de sa flamme intérieure constitue le premier pas essentiel dans la quête de Soi. Le voyage permettant cette rencontre nécessite un grand courage empreint d’humilité. Seul le courage humble permet d'appréhender la réalité de la vie dans sa vérité la plus absolue. Ne faut-il pas un grand courage empreint d’humilité pour oser s’émerveiller devant la valeur d’un bien aussi inestimable et unique ? Un bien irremplaçable qui peut, sans crier gare, me quitter ou quitter ceux que j’aime.

Lorsque ce courage humble vient à me manquer, deux scénarios se manifestent. Dans le premier, je fuis dans un monde illusoire où j’ai l’impression que la vie durera toujours et que rien, jamais, ne disparaîtra. Enivré par l’illusion, j’en oublie de vivre pleinement chaque jour de ma vie. Dans le deuxième scénario, les chaînes de la peur m’emprisonnent de façon implacable. Terrassé par la peur de mourir ou de perdre ce à quoi je tiens le plus au monde, je deviens incapable de célébrer ce bien si précieux qu’est la vie. C'est pourquoi il faut un grand courage pour oser rencontrer cette flamme intérieure dans sa vérité absolue et admirer sa force indestructible et sa vulnérabilité ultra-sensible.

The Journey - Mary oliver

One day you finally knew
what you had to do, and began,
though the voices around you
kept shouting
their bad advice—
though the whole house
began to tremble
and you felt the old tug
at your ankles.
"Mend my life!"
each voice cried.
But you didn't stop.
You knew what you had to do,
though the wind pried
with its stiff fingers
at the very foundations,
though their melancholy
was terrible.
It was already late
enough, and a wild night,
and the road full of fallen
branches and stones.
But little by little,
as you left their voices behind,
the stars began to burn
through the sheets of clouds,
and there was a new voice
which you slowly
recognized as your own,
that kept you company
as you strode deeper and deeper
into the world,
determined to do
the only thing you could do—
determined to save
the only life you could save.

What inspires me the most are real life stories..

When seeing, hearing or reading about some people's experiences I just feel like my brains is in total synchronicity with my soul and I am like : "we humans have unlimited power".

It all came from my mother, who was my number one fan and admirer, she loved everything I did and believed that I have magical powers, and her enthusiasm was so powerful that it made me love being me!

I felt so lucky to be me and thought that regardless of my chubby body I wouldn’t trade myself with anyone else.

Until the teenage hormonal changes started, where chubby turned into fat and my mom's advice into annoying nagging. It was a dark period but still a powerful learning experience.

Today I am almost 32 and can surely recount some moments that were pretty tough, where it felt more like the end than the beginning of a new phase.  It felt so painful to be me, to be fat to be ugly to be depressed or maybe to perceive myself that way. 

During those hard times, God sent me little angles, his inspiration through books, through personal biographies, where normal people that were having a hard time pulled themselves together to live the life they were destined for.

Those people are my inspiration; if they did it, then I can do it even if I am to stumble on the way there.

Gratitude

Our world is pretty messed up. With all the violence, pollution and crazy things people do, it would be easy to turn into a grouchy old man without being either elderly or male. There's certainly no shortage of justification for disappointment and cynicism.

But consider this: Negative attitudes are bad for you. And gratitude, it turns out, makes you happier and healthier. If you invest in a way of seeing the world that is mean and frustrated, you're going to get a world that is, well, more mean and frustrating. But if you can find any authentic reason to give thanks, anything that is going right with the world or your life, and put your attention there, then statistics say you're going to be better off.

Does this mean to live in a state of constant denial and put your head in the sand? Of course not. Gratitude works when you're grateful for something real. Feeling euphoric and spending money like you just won the lottery when you didn't is probably going to make you real poor, real quick. But what are you actually grateful for? It's a question that could change your life.

Recent studies have concluded that the expression of gratitude can have profound and positive effects on our health, our moods and even the survival of our marriages.

As Drs. Blaire and Rita Justice reported for the University of Texas Health Science Center, "a growing body of research shows that gratitude is truly amazing in its physical and psychosocial benefits."

In one study on gratitude, conducted by Robert A. Emmons, Ph.D., at the University of California at Davis and his colleague Mike McCullough at the University of Miami, randomly assigned participants were given one of three tasks.

Each week, participants kept a short journal. One group briefly described five things they were grateful for that had occurred in the past week, another five recorded daily hassles from the previous week that displeased them, and the neutral group was asked to list five events or circumstances that affected them, but they were not told whether to focus on the positive or on the negative.
Ten weeks later, participants in the gratitude group felt better about their lives as a whole and were a full 25 percent happier than the hassled group. They reported fewer health complaints, and exercised an average of 1.5 hours more.

In a later study by Emmons, people were asked to write every day about things for which they were grateful. Not surprisingly, this daily practice led to greater increases in gratitude than did the weekly journaling in the first study. But the results showed another benefit: Participants in the gratitude group also reported offering others more emotional support or help with a personal problem, indicating that the gratitude exercise increased their goodwill towards others, or more tehnically, their "pro-social" motivation.

Another study on gratitude was conducted with adults having congenital and adult-onset neuromuscular disorders (NMDs), with the majority having post-polio syndrome (PPS). Compared to those who were not jotting down their blessings nightly, participants in the gratitude group reported more hours of sleep each night, and feeling more refreshed upon awakening. The gratitude group also reported more satisfaction with their lives as a whole, felt more optimism about the upcoming week, and felt considerably more connected with others than did participants in the control group.

Perhaps most tellingly, the positive changes were markedly noticeable to others. According to the researchers, "Spouses of the participants in the gratitude (group) reported that the participants appeared to have higher subjective well-being than did the spouses of the participants in the control (group)."

There's an old saying that if you've forgotten the language of gratitude, you'll never be on speaking terms with happiness. It turns out this isn't just a fluffy idea. Several studies have shown depression to be inversely correlated to gratitude. It seems that the more grateful a person is, the less depressed they are.

Philip Watkins, a clinical psychologist at Eastern Washington University, found that clinically depressed individuals showed significantly lower gratitude (nearly 50 percent less) than non-depressed controls.

Dr. John Gottman at the University of Washington has been researching marriages for two decades. The conclusion of all that research, he states, is that unless a couple is able to maintain a high ratio of positive to negative encounters (5:1 or greater), it is likely the marriage will end.

With 90 percent accuracy, Gottman says he can predict, often after only three minutes of observation, which marriages are likely to flourish and which are likely to flounder. The formula is that for every negative expression (a complaint, frown, put-down, expression of anger) there needs to be about five positive ones (smiles, compliments, laughter, expressions of appreciation and gratitude).

Apparently, positive vibes aren't just for hippies. If you want in on the fun, here are some simple things you can do to build positive momentum toward a more happy and fulfilling life:

1) Keep a daily journal of three things you are thankful for. This works well first thing in the morning, or just before you go to bed.
2) Make it a practice to tell a spouse, partner or friend something you appreciate about them every day.
3) Look in the mirror when you are brushing your teeth, and think about something you have done well recently or something you like about yourself.

Sure this world gives us plenty of reasons to despair. But when we get off the fast track to morbidity, and cultivate instead an attitude of gratitude, things don't just look better -- they actually get better. Thankfulness feels good, it's good for you and it's a blessing for the people around you, too. It's such a win-win-win that I'd say we have cause for gratitude.

Ocean Robbins is an author, speaker, facilitator, movement builder and father. To learn more about his work or to get a free copy of his mini-book "The Power of Partnership," visit www.oceanrobbins.com. To learn more about his family's journey with autism, gratitude and miracles, click here.